Apr. 1st, 2004

prosicated: (Default)
I'm writing this entry for a number of strong supportive people out there, on my friends list or elsewhere, who need to hear this story, even if they’ve heard it before.

I've written this story one hundred times, cloaked in metaphor, bound in obscurity, locked in code or privacy, but I've told it far fewer times in my native language of plain English; this is neither the first or last telling. I'm not writing for sympathy or support anymore, I'm writing for courage, in public. After you've read this story, you're welcome to comment and tell me anything you want or need, but don't treat me like anything less than the whole and brave woman that I am. You may not agree with my role and choices in the event I am about to discuss, and I respect that, even having lived through it. I wouldn't wish this particular nightmare on anyone, but I lived through it and came out better for the decision. I would not want that option taken away from anyone, no matter their race, age, creed, or location.

The story I am about to tell is the one that got me to where I am today. Had I done anything differently, I would never be here, about to accept an offer to a PhD program nowhere near my friends and family. I would never have graduated from [my alma mater], or lived in Philadelphia. I never would have met [my partner]. The choices I've made, no matter how vile they seem to someone removed, are the choices that shaped me, and I am proud of myself.

Alright, that's enough, I'll begin writing.December 1, 1997 )

I wrote this entry after reading the public and moving accounts of both [livejournal.com profile] lilith23 and [livejournal.com profile] abbacat. As abbacat said, here's my face to add to the statistics of women who've had abortions. I am glad I did it, and I am stronger for having shared it. There's no shame in my memory, guilt perhaps, but no shame and no dirty secrets.I owe an immense debt of gratitude to those who've listened to this story, in the past, now, or in the future.

Thank you.


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